Joshua the Israelite and the Virtue of Integrity

Do you ever feel fractured, dissonant, and out of alignment?

Edgar Allan Poe is famous for his gothic fiction and poetry. Writing in the 1800s, his works present an atmosphere of darkness, mystery, horror, madness, and death.

One of his most famous stories is The Tell-Tale Heart where an unnamed character speaks internally to nobody in particular. Straight away you get the impression that this person is not mentally well, mostly because of how strongly he argues that he is totally sane ...

"True! — nervous — very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses — not destroyed — not dulled them. Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily — how calmly I can tell you the whole story."

The character apparently can hear things in hell but still claims to be of sound mind! He then goes on to describe what he has done that made him hear these things ...

"One of his eyes resembled that of a vulture — a pale blue eye, with a film over it. Whenever it fell upon me, my blood ran cold; and so by degrees — very gradually — I made up my mind to take the life of the old man, and thus rid myself of the eye forever ...

... In an instant I dragged him to the floor, and pulled the heavy bed over him. I then smiled gaily, to find the deed so far done. But, for many minutes, the heart beat on with a muffled sound. This, however, did not vex me; it would not be heard through the wall. At length it ceased. The old man was dead. I removed the bed and examined the corpse. Yes, he was stone, stone dead. I placed my hand upon the heart and held it there many minutes. There was no pulsation. He was stone dead. His eye would trouble me no more."

After murdering the old man he dismembers him, cuts off his head and hides the body parts under the floorboards ...

"I then took up three planks from the flooring of the chamber, and deposited all between the scantlings. I then replaced the boards so cleverly, so cunningly, that no human eye — not even his — could have detected any thing wrong. There was nothing to wash out — no stain of any kind — no blood-spot whatever. I had been too wary for that. A tub had caught all — ha! ha!"

The next day the police arrive, investigating reports of a shout coming from the room where the murder took place. The character confidently shows them around the whole building without any fear of suspicion, and even a hint of delight at his own cleverness in concealing the body so well. But then, as they all relax and talk, a new feeling begins to overtake him ...

"They sat, and while I answered cheerily, they chatted of familiar things. But, ere long, I felt myself getting pale and wished them gone. My head ached, and I fancied a ringing in my ears: but still they sat and still chatted. The ringing became more distinct: — it continued and became more distinct: I talked more freely to get rid of the feeling: but it continued and gained definitiveness — until, at length, I found that the noise was not within my ears. No doubt I now grew very pale; — but I talked more fluently, and with a heightened voice. Yet the sound increased — and what could I do? It was a low, dull, quick sound — much such a sound as a watch makes when enveloped in cotton. I gasped for breath — and yet the officers heard it not. I talked more quickly — more vehemently; but the noise steadily increased. I arose and argued about trifles, in a high key and with violent gesticulations; but the noise steadily increased. Why would they not be gone? I paced the floor to and fro with heavy strides, as if excited to fury by the observations of the men — but the noise steadily increased. Oh God! what could I do? I foamed — I raved — I swore! I swung the chair upon which I had been sitting, and grated it upon the boards, but the noise arose over all and continually increased. It grew louder — louder — louder! And still the men chatted pleasantly, and smiled. Was it possible they heard not? Almighty God! — no, no! They heard! — they suspected! — they knew! — they were making a mockery of my horror! — this I thought, and this I think. But anything was better than this agony! Anything was more tolerable than this derision! I could bear those hypocritical smiles no longer! I felt that I must scream or die! — and now — again! — hark! louder! louder! louder! louder! — “Villains!” I shrieked, “dissemble no more! I admit the deed! — tear up the planks! — here, here! — it is the beating of his hideous heart!”

This next story reflects a similar idea.

Don't worry, it's not quite as dramatic and macabre as the previous story! I made this one up but it's based on the experiences of several intelligent and high achieving friends of mine who have all reported the same kinds of experiences:

"I was initially very proud of myself for reaching that level. I had my own desk in the prestigious high-rise offices of the firm. It felt good to finally arrive. But then I actually had to do the work.

I always had a good eye for analysis. Like, I can tell you when a number seems off just by looking at it. People would always say, "Wow, how do you calculate things so quickly like that?" but that's not how you do it. I just know what kind of numbers to expect in the context given the parameters, right? So people would put things in front of me and straight away I would say "no, that one's not right." People don't look at the context or sense-check the numbers. They just follow a method and expect the final answer to be correct.

I was good at the job and I got a lot of praise and admiration for just being able to say "I work at this firm." But, honestly, behind the scenes I was depressed. I wouldn't have called it that at the time but that's what it was. Depression. This was everything I had been working for since childhood and it just was making me miserable. The culture was aggressively competitive and everyone around me was trying to keep up with everyone else. The nicest watch. The biggest house. Success was measured in money and money alone at the expense of a whole roster of other things I actually cared about.

I drank a lot at that time. I worked very long hours. I got very very unhealthy but I kept pressing on because that's what everybody else was doing even though it really didn't feel right. I did a few minor things that might not seem that bad. I didn't murder anyone but back-stabby stuff, you know? I was going crazy because it really weighed on me.  I realised that the toxicity of the work environment had infected the way I did things.

So I just quit. I went up to my boss one day and tapped him on the shoulder and he literally turned around and looked at me for one second and knew what I was going to say before I said it. "Don't," he said, "Don't do it." He really made it very difficult.

But my mind was already made up. I couldn't keep up with the constant pressure, the fake-ness, the empty flashy lifestyle. None of that actually ever interested me. And I was willing to take a significant downgrade in lifestyle to regain my sense of self.

Luckily the job did pay me pretty well. I had received a couple of bonuses so I had a good runway. The money thing wasn't the hardest part. The hardest part was taking all the expectations I had inherited and writing over them with my own passions, my own desires, and my own interests. I'm doing my own thing now without knowing exactly what the next stage is going to be. And that's okay."

Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive behavioural therapy is a common form of psychotherapy, used to help people overcome mental distress and negative thought patterns. The idea is that our thoughts, behaviours, and emotions are so deeply interconnected, any misalignment between the thoughts in our mind and our outward behaviours will cause negative emotions which feed back and show up as negative thoughts and negative actions.

The therapy usually works like this. First, dysfunctional narratives are identified and given definition. Then new patterns of thought are agreed upon that do a better job of aligning and integrating with the behavioural and emotional patterns we would like to experience.

A strategic change that makes the way you think and act more aligned and integrated, can alleviate a negative emotional state. The misalignment of thoughts, behaviours, and emotions is known as 'cognitive dissonance'. When your actions and thoughts are aligned in purpose, it feels harmonious like beautiful music. But when you are acting in a way that doesn't match the thoughts and beliefs in your mind, it is like an instrument playing two different tunes at once, creating discordant noise and unavoidable negative feelings.

The aim to achieve a congruence and coherence with everything moving seamlessly together as one. Thoughts, behaviours, and feelings all moving in the same direction with integrity. The structure of the relationships between all these parts holding without struggle.

This congruence and integrity is broken when we say and do things we secretly don't believe in. Whether it's concealing a murder we have committed or forcing ourselves to do work we don't believe in, this dissonance in our experience shows up in the way we feel and the way we act. We might become depressed or erratic and the only real fix is for us to re-integrate those parts of us that have become fragmented.

I believe that Integrity is a virtue, necessary for the pursuit of any higher calling, when actions must align with what you say you believe.

Integrity in Medieval Legend

Joshua the Israelite is one of the Nine Worthies. In medieval literature the worthies were key legendary figures in the collective body of traditions, stories, and myths passed down through the ages. They embodied the pinnacle of chivalric ideals across different cultures and eras, and served as role models for knights and nobles in their pursuit of excellence.

Joshua's identifying symbol is the Gibeon Sun. While the most famous story of Joshua is about when he and the Israelites destroyed the city of Jericho when the walls came tumbling down, he was also present and played a pivotal role in many other key events in the history of the Israelite people. One such event was the Battle of Gibeon, reported in the Book of Joshua:

"When the people of Gibeon heard what Joshua had done to Jericho and Ai, they resorted to a ruse: They went as a delegation whose donkeys were loaded with worn-out sacks and old wineskins, cracked and mended. They put worn and patched sandals on their feet and wore old clothes. All the bread of their food supply was dry and moldy. Then they went to Joshua in the camp at Gilgal and said to him and the Israelites, 'We have come from a distant country; make a treaty with us.'

... Joshua asked, 'Who are you and where do you come from?' They answered: 'Your servants have come from a very distant country because of the fame of the Lord your God. .. This bread of ours was warm when we packed it at home on the day we left to come to you. But now see how dry and moldy it is. And these wineskins that we filled were new, but see how cracked they are. And our clothes and sandals are worn out by the very long journey.' ...

Three days after they made the treaty with the Gibeonites, the Israelites heard that they were neighbors, living near them... Joshua summoned the Gibeonites and said, 'Why did you deceive us by saying, ‘We live a long way from you,’ while actually you live near us?... 'We feared for our lives because of you, and that is why we did this. We are now in your hands. Do to us whatever seems good and right to you.'

So Joshua saved them from the Israelites, and they did not kill them. That day he made the Gibeonites woodcutters and water carriers for the assembly, to provide for the needs of the altar of the Lord at the place the Lord would choose. And that is what they are to this day.

Now Adoni-Zedek king of Jerusalem heard that Joshua had taken Ai and totally destroyed it, doing to Ai and its king as he had done to Jericho and its king, and that the people of Gibeon had made a treaty of peace with Israel and had become their allies. He and his people were very much alarmed at this, because Gibeon was an important city ...

So Adoni-Zedek king of Jerusalem appealed to Hoham king of Hebron, Piram king of Jarmuth, Japhia king of Lachish and Debir king of Eglon. 'Come up and help me attack Gibeon,' he said, 'because it has made peace with Joshua and the Israelites.'

Then the five kings of the Amorites—the kings of Jerusalem, Hebron, Jarmuth, Lachish and Eglon—joined forces. They moved up with all their troops and took up positions against Gibeon and attacked it... So Joshua marched up from Gilgal with his entire army, including all the best fighting men ... On the day the Lord gave the Amorites over to Israel, Joshua said to the Lord in the presence of Israel:

'Sun, stand still over Gibeon', and ... The sun stopped in the middle of the sky and delayed going down about a full day ...

So Joshua subdued the whole region, including the hill country, the Negev, the western foothills and the mountain slopes, together with all their kings... from the whole region of Goshen to Gibeon. All these kings and their lands Joshua conquered in one campaign, because the Lord, the God of Israel, fought for Israel. Then Joshua returned with all Israel to the camp at Gilgal."

Joshua saw the deception of the Gibeonites and would not let it stand but when they gave up their lies and offered up their service instead, he found ways to integrate them into the society. He defended this harmonious arrangement fiercely and didn't allow even the five kings and their armies break it apart. Because of this, Joshua embodies this essence of integrity and shows himself in all of these kinds of stories.

Flow

The hardships of the Second World War were witnessed first-hand by a young boy from modern-day Croatia named Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. He was five years old when the war started, eleven when it ended, and his teenage years were lived out in the devastation of its aftermath. However, it was the happiness and meaning that people found in spite of this hardship that inspired him to study human psychology and well-being.

He later moved to America and got his PHD from the University of Chicago before further exploring human satisfaction. He wanted to know what it was exactly that made people feel joyful as they engaged in activities that were demanding, complicated, and risky. He researched all kinds of people, observing and interviewing them as they engaged in their work: artists, scientists, labourers, students, and many others.

He found that there was a formula to the kinds of activities that would induce a special kind of experience. It felt to them like a smooth, seamless, unobstructed flowing of attention, activity, and engagement, integrated and aligned together and aimed at a unified purpose. This is what he called "flow" and most importantly, when they were in this state of "Flow," people had a deep sense of satisfaction, meaning, and fulfilment.

The formula is simply a balance of two things: Challenge and Ability

If a challenge is greater than your ability, it's too hard and will cause feelings of frustration and disappointment.

If your ability is greater than the challenge, it's too easy and will not engage your attention and concentration.

But when your ability is consistently challenged, right at the edge of what you are capable of, you will enter a "Flow State".

• You will feel emotions of happiness, excitement, and satisfaction. Worries and stresses fade away.

• Your actions seem to happen almost automatically, with grace and precision, all fully directed towards the task in hand.

• Your thoughts are clear, with planning, recall, and execution all converging and focussing on the present moment.

In this engaged and active state of being, where all things are integrated and aligned, your perception of past and future fall away and time stands still.

Congruence

One of the core aims of cognitive behavioural therapy is congruence. This means thoughts, feelings, and behaviours are aligned and there is integrity between each of these parts. Flow is the ultimate expression of this alignment but it can be elusive. There are ways to work through obstacles and complications that prevent us from finding a sense of flow and congruence.

Here are 3 main techniques for you to try:

• Cognitive Distortions: Distortions and biases in your thinking are patterns of thought that do not line up with reality. There are some common distortions to be aware of and its worth checking your thinking against reality, watching for ways you might be catastrophising (blowing things out of proportion), mind-reading (assuming you know what someone else is thinking), over-personalising (blaming yourself for things that aren't your fault or taking things personally that aren't about you), or jumping to conclusions (making interpretations without evidence).

• Mindfulness Practice: By paying attention to the sensations you feel in your body and the content of the thoughts in your head you can start to develop a kind of outsiders perspective on your own experience of the world. There are lots of ways of doing this but you can start by taking some time to sit, relax, and simply notice what is happening without distracting yourself with inputs that numb and drown out those sensations (eg. not reading, watching, or listening to anything). This can help you to view your thoughts, feelings, and actions in the world with a kind of objectivity which helps you to make better, more strategic decisions about how to integrate and align yourself.

• Exposure Therapy: If you find yourself wanting to do something but strong emotions like anxiety, rage, depression, or even disgust are getting in the way of your ability to turn that desire into real world action, you can start with a smaller, lower stakes version of the behaviour. For example, public speaking might be something you want to do but the fear of doing it prevents you from bringing your emotions in line with your thoughts and actions. If you start by speaking to a few people you know well and gradually build up to may strangers, you can teach yourself to be less choked up by the fear and even to turn that fear into excitement and readiness.

Cognitive behaviour therapy and the concepts of congruence and flow help us to understand how to become more aligned in our thoughts, actions, and emotions, and experience the world in a way that is less negative and fractured. These are the forerunners to my model for integrity, which I simply call “Joshua”.

Thoughts, Actions, and Emotions have a "Show and Tell" relationship that integrates our thinking mind, physical body, and emotional state.

• Mind tells Body: Your thoughts direct you, telling your body which ways to move, act, and behave, so that your intentions and expectations are properly met as a result of your actions.

• Body tells Emotion: Your body directly senses the world and tells your emotions what to react to, based on your experience of intentional movement through the physical world.

• Emotion shows Body: Feelings are generated as reactions to that information, responding to the world with either negative or positive emotions that show up in your body as tears, shudders, laughter, nausea, gasping, tension etc.

• Body shows Mind: These physical responses show your thinking mind the consequences of a course of action, generating positive or negative memories depending on the result and response to the actions taken.

This is a constant informational loop that feeds back on itself, helping you to navigate the world. When these relationships become disjointed or flow in the wrong direction we can end up with our emotions dictating our actions and outside influences scripting our intentions.

When these relationships are upheld, our thoughts, actions, and feelings act as a dynamic process that can effectively respond to the world around us as we learn and mature and grow. Instead of telling everybody one thing and doing something else entirely, our thoughts, speech, and behaviours all back each other up. Instead of failing to do what we desire because we are overwhelmed by our negative feelings, we train ourselves to be able to face the world and react to it positively.

When we notice that our behaviours are making us feel worse because they don't line up with what we truly believe, we can take a new course of action that makes us feel satisfied, fulfilled, and whole.

This is what happens when we have integrity.

Joshua the Israelite is our spiritual example for someone who embodies and identifies as someone with integrity. A world with more Joshuas, where integrity is considered a virtue, is a world that does what it says. It's a place where people don't lie to themselves or each other. It's a place where people seek unity and congruence both within themselves and with the communities around them. When we do this, we don't just find more coherence and joy in our lives, we enter a state of seamless dynamic flow, where time disappears and we can just enjoy the moment.

Joshua the Israelite is a key character in my world-building project called "Atherealis"

Atherealis is a beautiful land of peace and abundance organised into a confederation of 18 city states, each overseen by their patrons: nine inspiring women, appearing as The Muses of ancient Greek myth, and nine heroic men, appearing as The Worthies of medieval chivalry. 

The Patrons rule with justice and wisdom as a council, meeting in a grand complex of civic buildings known as The Capital.

This huge collection of castles, cathedrals, palaces, and gardens sits at the centre of Atherealis and is home to an elite class of specially trained stewards, universally revered for their exceptional intellect, physical prowess, and emotional resilience. 

These volunteers dedicate themselves to serving their communities on behalf of the patrons, living purposefully, according to their to their ancient motto:

“Vitalitas Prosperitas Agentia”

Their hard work grants them access to a vast library of profound manuscripts and magical artefacts concealed deep in the labyrinthine structures of the Captial. This library continuously grows as the stewards engage deeply in mysterious studies and experiments. 

Who knows what treasures could be hidden within those cloistered halls? 

In future posts I will be talking more about the muses and the worthies and how they embody key virtues that we can take into the future.

• Do you ever feel fractured, dissonant, and out of alignment?

Comment below or send me a message.

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